


Terror

by artsyspikedhair



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Boggarts, Gen, Marauders' Era, Trans Character, Werewolf Reveal, angst so much angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-29
Updated: 2015-06-29
Packaged: 2018-04-05 17:18:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4188291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artsyspikedhair/pseuds/artsyspikedhair
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It is Boggart Day for 3rd Years, and two Gryffindor boys are terrified.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Terror

**Author's Note:**

> I take responsibility for any unrealistic characterizations.

It was Boggart Day for the third years, and Sirius Black was freaking out. He looked calm on the outside, but Remus could tell he was afraid because he had been quiet all day, just like Sirius could tell Remus was afraid because he would not put his book down at all throughout breakfast, even when James began complaining about how he thought Snivellus might be 'stealing his girl'. That was usually the point in the conversation where either Sirius would start listing all of Severus's bad qualities or Remus would patiently explain that he does not own Lily, and in fact Lily does not even like James so he should be planning ways to make her like him instead of insulting her friends, but neither were listening so Peter just listened and added his comments, which were usually something like "You should challenge him to duel," or something equally ridiculous. Neither Sirius nor Remus knew what the other was afraid of, but they knew it probably had something to do with the Defense Against the Dark Arts class that they had just walked into. 

The Marauders learned about boggarts from Peter, whose older sister had one in the attic of her house because she couldn't afford to remove it. Peter had told them about how he had seen the other three boys insulting him, and in that instant Sirius knew he had to avoid any possible contact with a boggart. He knew what his worst fear was, and he knew that if the others saw his boggart the fear would come true. The fear was the reason Sirius kept curtains around his bed. This fear is one of the nightmares that keeps him up, along with dreams of Regulus being beaten. Neither fear had come true yet, because with Sirius around Regulus was safe from his parents. Sirius gladly took on the role of blood traitor, because if he wasn't around his parents would find something to attack Regulus for. He knew to vocalize fear was to make it worse.

Remus also knew seeing a boggart would mean losing the only friends he ever had. The world is not kind to werewolves, and he has not forgotten the offhand comment James made about how werewolves aren't "exactly as human as the rest of us, because they're part dog right?". Remus laughed it off then but as time passed his mind goes back to these moments. Both boys feel as though they'll never truly belong if their fears get out.

The class had begun. The Professor explained what the spell to get rid of the boggart's effect was, and then said that the class would have the hands on experience that she told them they would have when they started learning about boggarts. Sirius tries so hard to make it to the back of the line, but he ends up in the middle. Remus just figures the sooner this is over the better. Classmates face their rather uninteresting fears. The other three marauders are surprised to find out James's worst fear was a car, of all things.

Then Remus was up, and the white orb appeared. Very few people can tell what it was, but Peter figured it out instantly. He said nothing. Remus was capable of casting the spell almost immediately after the boggart had changed, so very few people had the chance to see it really. He went back to his seat, hands trembling.

People go and fight their boggarts, but Sirius didn't see them. His mind just sees his best friends tormenting him the way they did to plenty of others. Suddenly, or at least to him it felt sudden, he was in front of the boggart. The boggart was changing, until it looked like mirror image of him. Only the boggart was naked, and boggart!Sirius looked like a girl. The real Sirius dropped his wand and ran out of the Defense classroom, not bothering to close the door.

He ran up to the Gryffindor tower. It was the only place he can think of to go because nobody else would be there. They were all in classes. Sirius was still running as he told the Fat Lady the password, and he felt as though his heart was beating out of his chest. Only when he got to his dorm, he was surprised to find Professor McGonagall already there. 

"Skipping class?"

Sirius was too out of it to make a coherent answer, still seeing that horrid boggart in the back his mind. "I, no, you see, boggarts were happening, I couldn't." He trailed off.

"You're not in trouble, Mr. Black. Just try to compose yourself in time for Potions."

Sirius was now really interested in knowing why she was in his dorm, but didn't ask. He simply began packing his things, convinced he'd never be allowed back. He was condemned to a life of misery, he supposed, simply for being cursed by biology into the world as the first born Black 'daughter'. He supposed he lucky to get the masculine name of Sirius, but that was only masculine feature allowed in his family. He learned to make himself into the boy he was at Hogwarts by stealing James' cloak to go to the library first year. Nobody ever asked him any questions and he made Regulus swear to secrecy. Now he supposed he was truly condemned. His friends would never allow a girl into the Marauders', let alone a freak like him.

Little did Sirius know, another member of the Marauders' was also silently panicking. Remus had not paid any attention to any of boggarts after him because his mind went straight to imagining all the names he'd be called. He only realized Sirius was gone once Potions had begun, and decided not to risk his grade to go chasing after him.

Sirius is interrupted from his dark thoughts by another young lad entering the room. James came in, and he looked angrily at Sirius. 

"You realize you are never going to know how ward off a boggart now, right?" James asked jokingly. Sirius didn't answer, simply packing more clothes into his truck. James decided to question him more directly now, bluntly asking "So why have you been lying to us about your worst fear for years? Your cousin isn't that bad." Sirius had no idea what James was talking about. 

"My cousin?" He echoed.

"Yeah, that was your boggart, wasn't it? I mean she looked a lot like Bellatrix, so I just assumed your worst fear was walking in on her naked, not seeing Remus snogging a girl like you said it was." Sirius was so relieved he figured he'd never have to mention this again. He would just let James tell everyone this story, and his problems would be over. Of course, some people not believe him at first, but somehow James Potter knew just how make a story seem believable. 

Remus, on the other hand, would have to confront his friends head on. Peter had seen the moon, and Remus knew he'd tell James and Sirius about it. Remus was scared, but he had lived a life without friends before. This could be managed. He'd survive.


End file.
